It’s hard to even give words to your upset, and you’re not sure you want to.  It’s so private and yet the weight of your concerns is so present for you that it feels as if everyone can see something is going on with you anyway.  You get good at answering, “oh, everything’s fine,” when you know it’s not.

I have a younger sister dealing with cancer right now.  I go about my life and it’s like a wave crashing against my brain that this horrible disease has hit so close to home. 

My family, all ten of us, are having emails fly between us.  We all believe she’ll come out of it well - we do.  Yet there are periodic reports that things are worse than we feared and our calm exteriors waver.  We’ll know more in a few weeks after her surgery.

I know many folks deal with crisis that are happening or have happened, and you have to continue to work or carry on with daily activities.  

Yesterday, another sister and I talked about hope and how much easier it is to have it when things are going well.  There’s evidence all around you in the world that things don’t always turn out the best for folks.  Our lives seem precarious and unexpected occurrences make us feel as if we’re not in control.  But here are a few things I know are helping me to stay focused and optimistic:

1.  Pray.  Even if you don’t believe in God, something put you here on Earth, and there is a powerful universal force at work that can alter the course of your circumstances at any moment. 

2.  Believe.  Have faith in a balance of nature beyond your imagination that is just and loving.  All is right in this mindset and heartset that gives you the strength to face any obstacle.

3.  Renew.  Look for ways to cry, laugh, dance, do what you love and be grateful for it.  Releasing pent-up emotions and tapping into joy, has a healing power.

4.  Share Modestly.  You need to share with others, but share with those you can trust.  Folks can’t tell what is going on with you even though you think they can.  So unless you’re prepared to answer lots of questions, talk with those you feel closest with and ask for them to listen without giving advice, or ask for words of support if you need them.  This opening with a few can help you stay focused and present when you’re with others.

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