If you’ve ever been to a conference you know the break times are short and it’s only then you can check your office messages, make phone calls, and meet with others.  At a recent coach conference I shared a room and Internet line with an associate.  This was tricky and caused me to have to get even more strategic with how I did my outside communicating. 

If you have something you want to say to someone, but little time in which to do it, here’s a few pointers you may find helpful:

1.  Be sure the recipient of your communication is open and available to hear what you have to say.   If not, your words are falling on deaf ears and your efforts are in vain.  If they are able to listen, great.  If not, use this time to make an appointment for a better time to talk.

2.  Give some thought to your message on your way to delivering it (and more time if you’re not short of it).  Formulate a brief outline of the main points you want to cover (even if the outline is in your head), and what you hope the outcome to be.   This will save you time when you’re finally able to talk.

3.  Deliver your message in a confident, stable voice, rather than sounding hurried – or worse, impatient.  Be concise and on target with what you have to say.  (Note:  if you’re on the phone with someone, walking while talking isn’t a good approach.  One reason is that moving locations while on a cell can not only make you sound winded, but the line can become staticy or even disconnect, which isn’t the best impression and it wastes time reconnecting.) 

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Early this morning I woke myself up, knowing I had an appointment to get to.  While showering (my favorite spot for reflection), I thought back over my last dream before waking…

My client had shown up and was circling my office looking for me.  My gardener pointed him to the front door.  My husband was home and I heard their voices when he opened the door.  I was frantically getting ready and a part of me was chiding myself for having overslept. 

Thankfully, it was just a dream, but also a wakeup call for me.  Was it caused because I was overtired and wanted to sleep more?  Was it a foretelling that my client would call and reschedule with me?  (It could also be a connection with recently seeing the movie, Alice-in-Wonderland or maybe reading Sunday’s L.A. Times article, “Breaking Into Dreams” about the dream thriller film, Inception.  Or maybe it was my recent comments added to the Women Entrepreneurs group on Linkedin around this question, “How do you balance work and life?”). 

But more than likely it’s my own unresolved concerns about how I manage my time. 

It’s a personal value of mine to find joy in all I’m doing and not wait till I have time off or less things scheduled on a certain day to enjoy life.  Even so, it was refreshing not to have a busy weekend for a change, a rarity for my husband and I, since we spend much of our time with our families.  There will be busier days than others and I recognize it’s more about how I am being with those events at the time that is the real “time effectiveness” component. 

Life balance and time management are completely within our individual control.  For example, you don’t have to take on that extra project or work somewhere that expects you to put in 12 hour days – it’s your choice.  But if you do have to do those things on occasion, it’s about finding grace with it and working as fluidly with it as you can.  Not resisting it or plodding painfully through it.  And as my dream response reminds me, “leave the chiding aside.”  Some helpful tips: 

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10 minutes late to your doctor appointment?  “No problem, everyone waiting expects delays and half their day shot.”   Three days late in getting back on that email?  “Not a big deal.  They’ll understand, since their email is likely overloaded too.”  A week late getting a project complete?  “I got it handled.  Extra time was factored it in at the beginning of the proposal.”  Not exercising day after day?  “Not the best, but I’m getting to it.  Can’t get there when there’s so much to do.”  Etc. Etc.

Are excuses merely tolerated or do they rule?  Unfortunately they rule—because we let them.  As a culture, we’re so conditioned to the fact that someone will have a reason for not doing what they said they would, that we’ve told ourselves this behavior is natural and something we must accept…so we do.

It seems we’re no longer able to regulate our own time and we often operate as if we’re at the mercy of it.  We seem to have lost the ability to make firm commitments and stick to them. 

Look more closely at the source of your excuses and find more effective ways to self-manage.  Rather than overbooking so you’re running late, maybe you should choose not to do that one extra thing.  Instead of postponing responses to important emails, you could set a fixed time to review your inbox and ignore all other miscellaneous emails until you have time scheduled to get back to them.  If you set your most important projects at the head of the list, then wouldn’t your time be most devoted there?  The project might even be completed a little early.  What a concept!  And ignoring your exercise is just plain shooting yourself in the foot.  Afterall, you need your health to get all your stuff done.

But then, part of the problem is thinking you have to do it all.  Then when you can’t, you make up an excuse so you don’t tarnish your image as superachiever to others.  Try out saying instead, “thanks, can’t take that on right now, even though I’d like to help.”  OR don’t give any excuse at all.  French author, Jules Renard, said, “The only man who is really free is the one who can turn down an invitation to dinner without giving an excuse.” 

Be courteous to others, but don’t confuse that with your reliance on lame excuses for not keeping your word.  If you’re confident in your behaviors and choices and manage your time more effectively, then you rule and not your excuses! 

If you’re showering and spot a spider, do you ignore it, quickly flush it down the drain, or  stop and get out of the shower to carry it to safety?

As I let the one I’d discovered find its way to spider heaven down the drain, I was reminded how similar interruptions occur while you work that force your attention.  A phone call, a technical problem, an unexpected meeting, a friend or family member in need, an errand or project you’d forgotten you had to do.  Ignoring them is rarely a viable option.  You often have to make a quick judgment as to whether you’ll stop to take immediate and brief action on it, schedule time to attend to it later, or get more fully engaged to complete it and possibly not get back to what you were first doing.

All spiders have venom, but it’s not always harmful to humans.  Similarly, distractions can hurt your progress, but not if you have a plan for your day that includes flex time to handle changes.  Try to schedule a few less things each day so that you can accomplish them and not be upset when you’re pulled away to do something unexpected.

What is your working style and how do you manage your time?  Email info@creatingatwill.com and ask for our free .pdf assessment to find out how you work best.  (For fun: read info on common household spiders)

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Whether you’re a manager in an organization or need to more effectively manage your own business as an entrepreneur, these styles of management can get in the way if you’re not aware you’re doing them. Here’s what I’ve discovered with my clients that doesn’t work and how to fix them.

1.  Go along, get along

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. Are you still trying too hard to be accepted and gain recognition for the work you do?  You may find that rather than trust your instincts and ideas you’re trying to fit in and prove your value.  In Lois P. Frankel’s book, Women Who Don’t Get the Corner Office A Good Man Is Hard to Find film Someone Like You… dvd Dark Matter rip Wishmaster divx The Karate Dog psp , you may still be acting more like a “girl” and not like a “woman.”  It’s time to leave your comfort cloak behind, step up and try on being more of the woman you are.

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2.  Overcompensating.  If you feel you have a tendency to be agreeable too quickly to other people’s ideas or plans, or you tend to change your already crammed schedule to accommodate someone else who neglected to give you advance notice,  you’re ignoring your own value. Maybe you feel you’ve underserved someone or been less than cooperative and now you’re overcompensating.  Listen to your heart and not just your head.  Give yourself time before adding more to your plate by stepping away for a minute to think it through before replying.

3.  Not doing your homework.  Do your homework on a project or idea before launching yourself into it.  If you’re too busy for the upfront preparation needed, get others on your team to help you do it so you don’t rush ideas through and end up somewhere you don’t want to be, or even worse, backpaddling.  You may quickly decide you’ll handle something without all the facts in front of you, and then wonder later why you’re having to put in overtime on the project.

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