Despite your best intentions, there are times when things others handle on your behalf take longer than you are told they will take originally, than you expect is reasonable, or because mistakes were made that have to be corrected.

Here’s a few solutions for dealing with these frustrating times that I’ve found works:

1.  Always give others a longer time to complete big projects, (I recently experienced this with a transition to a new computer).  Start the project only when you have the time to give it time.  That way even if the project completion takes longer than you expect, it won’t be as long as it would have been if you had given it a shorter completion date.

2.  Give yourself the energy fudge room to handle a growing or expansive project.  If you have so many deals going on that one is pulling dramatically for your atttention, it can seem overwhelming, when having the expectation that it could take longer, you’ll be more prepared to ready yourself for the task. (more…)

We’ve all met the “Sue Sylvester,” the bully who has their own agenda and wants to push us around till they get what they want.  (Sue is the girls’ cheerleading squad coach on Glee, if you’ve not seen that t.v. show).  A few of the common bullying traits you will experience, or may be experiencing now are:

1. Aggressive behavior that is often rude, inappropriate, and many times over the top. 
2. A frequent urge to add shock value so those around them are awed, even if the attention they get is negative.
3. An overblown sense of themselves and their accomplishments, while underneath they have fragile egos.
4. A strong need for recognition, but it’s reward is only temporary for them.
5. Their power is fed by the faction of people around them who frequently respond to their requests out of intimidation, yet they don’t respect these people.
6. Poor tolerance for anyone’s excuses, because they feel no one cuts them any slack.  (the victim, though they victimize)
7. Awareness that the people who support them are  just trying to stay on their good side, stand to gain by their wins, and/or hope to convert them, so they often feel alone and act independently.
8. Can generate big wins, though they often steamroll over people or other projects to get there.

What can you do in your dealings with someone like this?  If you continue to do the right thing and use ethical, courteous behaviors that follow certain timelines or procedures, face it, you will threaten their tough guy “eat or be eaten now” approach.  Regardless, your best approach is to stand firm in your confident choices and behaviors, even if it means you now have an enemy you didn’t create.  

It is frustrating when bullies get their way easily if they have gone around policies and procedures that you’ve painstakingly followed, delaying your wins.  But just because they can push their way to the top of the hill doesn’t mean they won’t be the first one to fall off it.  Even if you’re not there to witness it.

Even so, don’t look for them to fail, don’t focus on them at all.  Stand your own ground, while being bottom-line and professional in any interactions with them.  They may even target you more and try to bring you down, as Sue does the Glee Club’s coach, Will.  But don’t be so easily knocked off course and don’t show them at any point that their intimidation practices are getting to you, as they may have a tendency to dig in harder.

Whenever possible, avoid someone with these character defects or keep a low profile.  When you have to deal with them, don’t take things personally or let it affect your own performance.  Get your encouragement and support from yourself first and then others you can depend on that have your best interests at heart.

With job security not so secure these days, bucking authority in your job could lead to job layoff.  Employees don’t want to be fired. so their suppression and even fear of their boss leads to feeling undervalued and ultimately job dissatisfaction.  Even entrepreneurs need to know the when and how of conversations in critical business relationships.  So how do you know when you can speak up or when it’s best to be quiet? 

If you’re a manager, director or supervisor, chances are you’ll have more opportunity for input than someone further down the chain.  But not always.  Some bosses have a great need to control and if you’re an excellent employee doing well they may feel inadequate next to you, even try to undermine your efforts, as well as not listening to your input.  If you’re confident in your self, your job role and the tasks at hand, then consider the following:

1.  Can you risk losing your job?  You should always have a minimum of three months salary saved in your bank account that’s enough to cover all expenses at any time.   This is security in many senses, including a useful backup should you decide to change jobs.  If you don’t have those finances, consider what other recourse you could rely on, should you be fired.  This is a risk that you’ll be taking, but take it with advance preparation.

2.  How important is your boss’s influence and interactions with you regarding your job performance and job satisfaction?  While no one should work in negative surroundings, if you have little interaction with your boss and recognize it’s their general style of communication, you may decide to leave matters lie and not contest their behavior.  A simple straight and directly spoken comment such as, ”John, I hear you and I’ll take care of it,” may get the point across.  However, if you can pleasantly smile it off, and go about your business, then this is obviously a first and easier approach.

3.  Is this a particularly bad time for your boss personally or professionally?  We all have periods of our life that are better or worse.   It’s possible he or she is dealing with a personal crisis you’re unaware of.  See what you can find out without talking with them directly and consider if you can wade through a short-period with them that may be difficult, yet you know the high tides will soon recede and your boss will return to his/her professional demeanor.

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