While trying to stay optimistic about the rushed feeling that always accompanies the end of the year, the feeling that there’s still lots to do and not enough time to get it done, money to make it happen, or energy to do it, your evil twin sister might emerge to complain, confuse and offer contradicting views.  My inner “Griselda,” acerbically speaks at times and offers versions of the following 12 Days of Christmas.  See if you see your evil twin in this…

1. A partridge in a pear tree – no, no partridge, no bird at all in the tree – or the oven for that matter. Since there’s also little money growing on your tree.  Cut out extras; forget stocking stuffers.  If you hold off on presents, maybe you can take off to Bali for a real Christmas.

2.  Two turtle doves - are you kidding?  You can’t take in any more animals, you can barely remember to feed the fish (let alone kids).  Find a dog walker and then maybe you can finally take in that cuddly puppy Rover…or on second thought, consider how you can earn extra holiday mula, like, maybe you can walk the neighbor’s dogs.

3.  Three french hens – what’s with the animals?  You’ve got plenty to do already with taking care of yourself and your immediate others.  You still have to figure out your trip to your family, where you’ll share all that lovey-dovey cheer and your badly wrapped presents.  Just keep the French hens and you can return them to Paris yourself.

4. Four calling birds - you might be hearing calling, but it’s not birds.  It’s your goody-two-shoes self trying to butt in and tell you to get the main things done and don’t worry about the rest.  Don’t listen.

5.  Five golden rings – you wish!  You don’t even clean the one you have.  The only rings you have to deal with are the rings around your kitchen sink and tub.  Then there’s the several closets of junk, old clothes and stuff in your storage room, paper stacks that are just too much to go through and sort.  So, just toss it all out. 

6.  Six geese a-laying – well at least that takes care of breakfast.  Forget what they say about too many eggs being bad for your cholesterol.  You’re already not eating healthy this holiday season and consuming whatever is front of you, so just know you’ll start the new year being fatter like everyone else.  Now go lay down and rest. 

7.  Seven swans a-swimming – that brings me to exercise where you’re no doubt slacking off.   Don’t blame yourself, it’s all those holiday parties.  If they’d only hold the parties at the gym you could fit exercise in.  Use any adrenaline you have to whip all your projects back into shape before the year ends.  Even if it kills you, you’ll be the winner!

8.  Eight maids a-milking – your livin’ in a dream world.  You can’t find eight maids to help you get your work done at this late date.  But no milk; no problem.  Convert your family to apple juice or your boss to a liquid free diet.

9.  Nine ladies dancing – that’s a picture of shear exhaustion!  You can’t compete with the dancing of nine ladies, so forget super efforts to get it all done in the next few weeks and just sit this dance out.  

1o.  Ten lords a leaping – yes, you can avoid it all and leap right out of here on those ten tiny toes.  Chuck it all and enjoy the holidays in your secret, phone-unplugged cave (or luxury hotel room).  Afterall, you are the lord of your domains and don’t worry about mastering any of ‘um.

11.  Eleven piper’s piping – it’s about time someone piped up to ask what all this commotion is about.  Stop all this busyness and schedule it for next year.  As a famous Scarlett once said, “Tomorrow’s another day!”

12. Twelve drummers drumming – guess it does take 12 drummers to bang it into your head.  You finally got your priorities straight and figured out what’s important for your end of year closure…or have you??

If you’re conflicted, it’s no wonder.  That’s what our evil twin intends for us.  Treat her to a hot apple cider toddy and tell her to relax.  If you get big projects done by the end of the year without driving yourself and others crazy, good for you!  And if not, there’s a new year brewing and plenty of time for changes.

Tags: changes, closure, end of year, lots to do, optimism

This entry was posted on Friday, December 11th, 2009 at 9:06 pm and is filed under Gaffes & Giggles. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.